First month with baby

I have a confession. First month with the baby was the hardest experience I've experienced in a while. Let me explain. First off I had to have a C-section and it was tough for me because I have never spent so much time in the hospital nor have I ever had surgery. Not only did I have to recover from major surgery now I had to care for a new life! :) A blessing that I'm very grateful for (we had been praying for a little one ever since we got married). All I'm saying is that having a C-section is a lot of pain and it takes much longer to recover from a vaginal birth. I've heard this from many women I know personally so I'm not just making this up. The next reason why it was so hard is I think the first month you worry so much about the baby and you are new and constantly learning every day. I still am learning but now I'm more in a routine and Timothy has a much better schedule now. I am not complaning I am just being honest because truth be told this is the biggest change that's occured in my life besides getting married. It takes me a while to adjust to change but once I get it down I feel like I accomplished something great. I am so happy and proud of my hubby and I. We are raising a beautiful child, and living in our dream house. I am very thankful and I can't believe Timothy is about to be 4 months old in two weeks. :) We love you so much Timothy and I love seeing your smiley happy face every day. Thanks for being such a good boy.

Pregnancy Recap

As I'm sitting here with the baby next to me I couldn't help but think all the hard things I went through in order to have my angel. I'm not writing this so people can think awe poor Perla but I'm doing for myself and for journaling purposes. It's easier for me to type things thant to write them. Yesterday for Fathers Day Timothy and I surprised daddy with a new outfit, a video with our favorite pictures of 2011 and baby pictures, we also made him a book, and breakfast of his choice. It ended up being a 17 minute video because I have so many pictures lucky for me Chris didn't mind because he is just that loving. As I was going through the thousands of pictures I have already taken I couldn't help but realize I can't belive how fast 38 1/2 weeks went by and I am extremly grateful. That's why I'm inspired to write about a recap of the entire 9 months. This had to be one of my biggest trials that I've ever experienced. Let me explain. The first trimester I was feeling nausceous, i throw up many times, and I had a hard time eating good. I was also working and taking classes. I was busy busy and it made it hard for me to get my rest and feel good. I hated how smells made me go crazy and always had the feeling of wanting to barf even though I couldn't. After I got through the first trimester things got better and second trimester was awesome! I wasn't too big and I could eat more things and not feel like throwing up all the time. The weather was beautiful and I was able to sleep normal again. In between second and third trimester I got some pretty upsetting news. I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes, drs scared me so bad and I had to go on a very depressing hard diet. It's even harder to do it while your pregnant and hormonal. The reason doctors scared me was because they told me I would have to get insulin right away because I had some record highs with the glucose drink test. I had to meet with a diabetes specialist and then do NST tests twice a week, as well as do a fluid check once a week. IT WAS DREADFUL! I hated my doctors office not the first one (Dr. Tutt) but the second one is called PPA (Phoenix Perinatal Associates) I will never go back!!! Hated it with a passion. They were the most unorginized ridiculous place ever. Appointments could take anywhere from an hour to 4 hours. YEAH not even kidding either. Try doing that twice a week I wanted to blow that place up. It was so hard to wake up early on those days and want to go. I have to say I never missed an appointment no matter how tired, or sick I felt. After this experience I felt like never wanting to get pregnant again but then I had my little one and I can tell you that I want lots of little ones because it's totally worth it. They truly are a peace of heaven.

Weeks go by!

I feel like the weeks are going fast at times but defidently not smooth.
Im having a hard time dealing with my recent diagnosis of having GESTATIONAL DIABETES and HYPERTENSION. I was so sad that I didn't do good with my blood sugar.

I now have to diet hard core and not cheat for the rest of my pregnancy. UGH! I've been on it now for two weeks and I hate it. Don't get me wrong I'll do whatever it takes in order to deliver this baby as healthy as possible. I just have to try to be strong. As much as I am struggling I am trying to be positive. I always do but I feel like I've been having too much of a pitty party. I need to pony up and just suck it up.

And let the countdown begin. I have ten weeks left and that equals to about 70 days. I can't believe Im finally seeing a little bit of light at the end of this long tunnel. What an emotional roller coaster I've been on.

I must say my husband has been my one steady consistent foundation. He's so perfect. I love him and our son. He has worked harder than ever and he makes me so happy. He's had to put up with me complain and me crying. He holds me close and tell me itll be okay./

Ob visit #5

Last week I went to my fifth visit and it went by fast. We just did what we had to do and he answered some questions and asked me about how it went with the specialist and then that pretty much wrapped it up.

I got weighed, measured, and they took my blood pressure like normal.
We listen to the babys heart beat every time to make sure the baby is doing good and he has a normal heart beat.

In all honesty this whole high blood pressure scares me. The more I read and learn about it the more scared I become. All I want is to hold my baby and make sure that he is healthy and strong. I want to make it without too many complications but it feels like I just have to go through this medication and I have to be checked out by a specialist, which for some reason makes me nervous and scared.

I need to just be stronger and remember that no matter what the Savior is there to listen and help us. I know it'll all work out like it's suppose to.
I am very gratefull for the opportunity to be pregnant and to have the family and friends that I have. I am so excited and apart from these little trials I am facing I am counting my blessings and trying to remain calm. I love my husband for helping me so much. I dont know what I'd do without him.

Ob visit num 4

This visit was very quick in the beginning and then it kind of dragged but at least it was funny.

Chris and I got there perfectly on time and we called inside within 5 - 10 minutes. It's always a good thing when you don't have to wait long in the boring waiting room. Then I got weighed and we went into the little room. . She put on the blood pressure thing and then she told me it was still high. BOOO!!!!!!! :( I was so sad. She told me that those weren't the numbers I want and then we listened to the babys heart. The babys doing great and that makes me so happy. Im glad Rudd baby is doing well inside my belly. The Dr came in the room after that and he told me that I need to be referred to a specialist so I can get looked at and be given the right medicine. I dont know about you but that sounds scary to me and it makes me feel like a freak.
I don't know why my numbers are so high and yesterday I felt good. I dont understand what my body is doing. I just pray that everything works out and that I pull through healthy. I knew that pregnancy would be worth but I didn't know how or what would happen to my body.
Regardless I am so blessed to have the family, friends, and amazing husband. He is perfect to me and is so caring.

What happens next?

My next Ob Dr. appointment is December 20th, only five days before Christmas and hopefully we'll do another ultrasound then.
Im waiting to be called from the office so they can give me this specialist number so I can go there as soon as possible. I have to go there before my next OB appointment.

I honestly feel sad and I want to just get this overwith. My attitude is seriously-whatever while rolling my eyes. I need to be more positive but it's a little difficult. Until next time DRS.


<3

Week 15

Im officially 4 months pregnant this week! :) I am so happy and excited to announce how much better I'm doing. I am able to do more things throughout my day and get so much accomplished. I also wake up in a much better mood because I'm sleeping much better in the night time. I get up less to go to the bathroom and I'm trying to sleep as much as I can since I know things will be changing once I have a baby.
Last week was pretty normal besides the Halloween festivities and eating candy here and there. On Wednesday I wasn't feeling too good and since cereal has been a safe choice for me to eat before I go to bed I decided to eat that and it betrayed me. :(
I was so sad I had an accident outside in my backyard since I was trying to feed my dogs I gagged and everything that was left in my stomach no longer was there. I was home alone and I really hate being sick without anyone to take care of me. I'm used to having my mom spoil me and help me out when I'm sick. Chris was at work and I had to wait two hours after this little incident. I got it all over my clothes. EWWW so I immediatley was bawling and then I tried to calm down because I know it's not good for me to get that way. Then I hopped in the shower and felt so much better. When Chris came home he made me feel better and I slept like a baby.
Sometimes when I get sad I feel overwhelmed and this week I felt it. I felt like I don't know if I can do this... It's hard for me and I want to be strong but sometimes the adversary is trying so hard to bring you down. I just need to remember to cling on to the Lord, and get on my knees to pray. I need to do it more, specially right now because I know I need to be better and need to be positive.

I am very fortunate and although I comlain I'm thankful to be pregnant with a little angel. It's just hard to carry a little person, be hormonal, sick, and have the daily stresses of life on top of it; but I wouldn't trade it for the world.

I know this will all pay off and I just need to be patient more than anything. I am so happy to be pregnant at this time in my life along with my eternal companion that I've been happily married to for a year.
:)

Week 12

Didn't start out so bad. But I found out that I had to drop out of one class although I learned everything I needed to.. HA ! I won. just kidding, well I felt so bad because I didn't know about these "rules" but whatever. They didn't want to work with me although I've been pretty sick on and off throughout this pregnancy, and I'm sorry but my family and I come first in my life and everything else can come after that. So its okay I know that things happen for a reason and it was about to get real hard and stressful for me anyways.
Honestly though, it's not like me to quit my class and I really wish it didn't have to end that way but it's life and sometimes things happen. I know that me being pregnant has changed my life a lot and it's not a bad thing but it is what it is. We feel very blessed to be pregnant and I want my baby to be as healthy as we can both be.
Then the rest of the week was alright but the weekend literally sucked.
I was not a happy camper on Friday night. I had been feeling pretty crummy all week but on Friday night I didn't sleep good at all. My throat was hurting so bad and I could feel me getting sick. Same thing goes for Saturday, a very bad night of no sleep and then on Sunday I woke up super tired and in a bad mood. I was a little upset because I knew I couldn't miss church even though I felt like bird poop. We still don't know anyone in the ward and our NURSERY LEADER is sick a lot too. So greatttt there you have us going when Im in a bad mood and not wanting to play for two hours. Church made me turn my attitude around and it did go faster than last week but it was still rough. Chris did awesome teaching the lesson and we got through it alive. After church I went from bad to worse. I threw up twice. I havent thrown up once in this pregnancy till this Sunday. UGHHHH I hated it. Sunday evening I didnt eat anything besides Orange Juice. I have to tell you how good Chris took care of me. He just held me Sunday night as I cried and cried because I was sick, sick, and very exhausted. I felt so bad because I wanted to eat but couldn't. My wonderful husband made delicious steak, potatoes, and corn but I had to save it for the next day. BOO!
It's been a little less than a week and I still feel sick but not as bad. I can breathe better and I only have a runny nose with a little cough. I have been trying to take care of myself and get some rest.

Anyways in a nut shell Week 12 was extremely hard for me but I have been loving how much closer I've gotten to my husband. I know he'll make a great father and his patience is unlike anyone elses. Thank you Christopher I couldn't have done this without you. I love you and our baby. By May we are going to have a beautiful baby to bless our family.

<3
Perla

My daily struggle- food

I am having such a hard time eating.
Everything looks and smells gross to me.
I am always hungry and then when I finally get
some delicious food I just pick at it and eat
a little.
Now this doesnt happen all the time but it happens
like almost every day. It's been one of my major
struggles this far. I thought it would get better by
now and it does on some days and then it doesn't.
I am just going to try ad figure out what my body wants
and can actually swallow without gagging the whole time.


Keep in mind I have never been this picky in my life.

Don't worry I am eating as much healthy foods as I can.
I always take my prenatals and drink like 6 or 8 water
bottles a day. That keeps me busy with bathroom breaks. :P

One more week and I will finish my first trimester. YAY!

Next week

In my opinion I will be going on 8 weeks which equals 2 months!!! So i'm keeping my fingers crossed and hoping to be close to my calculations. I read symptoms and from what I remember of the cycle business that sounds about right. I hope it's true and if it is im going to celebrate and have a party!
But really I am praying and praying to have a healthy and good pregnancy. Sometimes I think I should've waited to tell people but you know what it's my life and I can do what I want. I will tell who and when I want, with the input of my husband of course.

On Tuesday I have my first appointment with my OBGYN his name is Dr. Tutt. I am so excited, nervous, and happy about it. I just want to fast forward for it to be Tuesday already. I will update my blog as soon as I get on a computer. I am going to write everything down. I have so many questions and I want to hear what the doctor says.

I still can't believe Im pregnant sometimes. I doubt me being pregnant for reals. I dont know why my head messes with me. I just dont want for anything to go wrong. I want to get the first three months out of the way. Everyone and books say that they're the most important so I am trying to be very good about all the small and big things. I wonder if anyone worries as much as me?

One more thing about the first couple weeks. I am so emotional! I have never been so sensative than this. I am so delicate and picky about things recently.

Here are the two best examples as of lately:
1. I cried because I was overwhelmed about some idiot using my card and going on a shopping spree. THANKS JERK! You made a pregnant woman so pissed that she wanted to come to your house and punch you. This made my account negative for about 6 days. I hope you get caught.
2. This last Sunday we were about to go to church and my car wouldnt start. GREATTT!! Who doesnt love car troubles on a hot sunny day. We had to buy a new battery when we have 209403820843 million other things to pay. I hate how that happens.

No doubt in my mind that last weekend I felt like the ADVERSARY working so hard to break us down. To try and bring us down and make us feel like we couldnt do it. Like your stuck and you cant get up. Even though they're small things sometimes they seem big. I've realized that once something good comes along you are tempted (or at least I feel like I am ) to feel down . Satan knows that we are happy and are doing what's right and he wants to break that. He doesn't want us to be happy but on the other hand you have the worlds best shield *HEAVENLY FATHER & HOLY SPIRIT* so I decided we need to step it up and be strong. We need to pray even more and read more. We will do just that. I want to be ready and keep the adversry as far away from my home as possible.

Baby baby I will do whatever it takes for you, we have only found out two weeks ago and we already want you to be here. I want to fast forward and hold you. We love you and I can't wait to meet you. I know the Lord gave us the oppurtunity to get pregnant at the perfect time with the perfect baby.

I am feeling so much better today. I made it through this rough rough week and it's almost the weekend and who doesnt love that?

<3
Your mama